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Funny-Quotes-About-Computers, Geek-Quotes P3
A bug in the code is worth two in the documentation.
Any given program costs more and takes longer each time it is run.
If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
Any given program will expand to fill all the available memory.
Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable.
There's always one more bug.
It works better if you plug it in.
Experience varies directly with equipment ruined.
Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.
If it looks tough, it's damn near impossible.
Adding manpower to late software makes it later.
Whatever you did, that's what you planned.
Our computer has never had an undetected error.
Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
Want to make your computer go really fast? Throw it out the window.
To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.
Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature.
The Net interprets censorship as damage and routes around it.
EMAIL - when it absolutely positively has to
get lost at the speed of
light.
A Big Mac, French fries and a large Coke!
A Macintosh a day keeps Apple Happy and Rich!
A supercomputer is a machine, that runs an
endless loop in just 2 seconds.
Any given program will expand to fill available memory.
ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI.
I didn't write this; a very complex macro did.
I want my data back, machine, and I want it now!
Machine language programmers do it very fast.
Machine-independent: Does not run on any existing machine.
Modem - Monumentally Overpriced Data Eating Machine.
Newton: A pocket-sized Machine That Goes Ping!
Real programs don't eat cache.
The nice thing about standards is, there are so many to choose from.
The only good Mac is a big Mac!
Unix: When you can't afford the very best.
What a depressingly stupid machine, said Marvin and trudged away.
Windows 3 - the MAC for the rest of us!
Fast, fat computers breed slow, lazy programmers.
Programming just with goto's is like swatting
flies with a sledgehammer.
There are two ways to write error-free programs.
Only the third one
works.
A year spent in artificial intelligence is enough to
make one believe in
God.
Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool
will want to use
it.
To understand recursion one must first understand recursion.
Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are!
Windows: Just another pain in the glass!
Who's General Failure, and why is he reading my disk?
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
It is impossible to make anything foolproof,
because fools are so
ingenious.
Any given program, when running, is obsolete.
All programmers are playwrights and all computers are lousy actors.
Managing programmers is like herding cats.
Never let a computer know you're in a hurry.
Read my chips; no new upgrades!
Hit any user to continue.
If hardwear overheats, does it turn into software?
He's dead Jim. You get the tricorder, I'll get his wallet.
Enter any 12-digit prime number to continue.
Error reading FAT Table. Try Skinny one? (Y/N).
Error: General Protection Fault. Condom not installed.
Is OS-2 only half an operating system?
Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot.
A computer scientist is someone who fixes things which aren't broken.
Air-conditioned environment - do NOT open Windows.
All computers wait at the same speed.
All you need to know is the user interface.
2400 Baud makes you want to get out and push!
A computer's attention span is as long as it's power cord.
A fatal error has been detected. Call mortician (Y/N) ...... hello?
A mainframe: The biggest PC peripheral available.
A Scotty error has occurred an' Ah kent chenge the laws o' physics!
Access denied: nah nah na nah nah!
All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?
An error? Impossible! My modem is error correcting.
As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.
Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay!
Best file compression around: DEL *.* = 100% compression
Breaking Windows isn't just for kids anymore.
BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!
Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.
C code. C code run. Run, code, run ... PLEASE!
C program run. C program crash. C programmer quit.
C:\ Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.
C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN
C:\WINDOWS C:\WINDOWS\GO C:\PC\CRAWL
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