A weekend wasted isn’t a wasted weekend.
Life is nothing like the brochure.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
Earth first. Then we screw up the other planets later.
Don't bother me. I'm living happily after.
Do I LOOK like a friggin' people person?
Here I am. Now what are your other two wishes?
Back off! You're standing in my aura.
I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
I think: therefore I don't listen to Dan Rather.
I think we met in a past life--and you were a dipstick then,
too.
Life is a trip. Do you have a ticket or are you
hitch-hiking?
The world will end the day after the warranty expires.
According to my calculations the problem doesn’t exist.
Admit nothing, deny everything and make counter-accusations.
Adult: One old enough to know better.
After all is said and done, more is said than done.
Alcohol is not the answer; it just makes you forget the
question.
All generalizations are dangerous, even this one.
The only time the world beats a path to your door is when
you're in the bathroom.
52% of all statistics are false.
Addicted to the Net: Home is where I hang my @
The geek shall inherit the earth.
Suburbia: where they tear out the trees and name streets
after them.
This would be really funny--if it weren't happening to me.
Anybody with money to burn will easily find someone to tend
the fire.
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
Earth is full. Go home.
Caution: I have an attitude and I know how to use it.
You say I'm a bitch like that's a bad thing.
If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet I'll put
shoes on my cat.
We have enough youth. How about a fountain of Smart?
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large
groups.
When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.
Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
Mind like a steel trap. Rusty and illegal in 37 states.
Uniquely mal-adjusted, but fun.
Drugs lead to nowhere, but it's the scenic route.
