Funny Quotes P3

Funny Quote Saying P3

 
  • Excuse me for interrupting and I’m not trying to make a pass, but you must be leaving the country if you’re packing that much .
  • You might as well sleep with me because I’m going to tell everyone we did anyway!
  • I would say God bless you but it looks like he already did.
  • It’s a good thing I have my library card, because I’m checking you out.
  • Oh, sorry, I’m reserved for someone else.
  • If I followed you home, would you keep me?
  • You look like my second wife! And I’ve only been married once!
  • Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
  • Do you believe in love at first site, or should I walk past you again?
  • Excuse me can I borrow a quarter, Mom told me to give her a call the first time I fell in love.
  • Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
  • I got a sweater for Christmas. I wanted a screamer or a moaner.
  • If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway?
  • Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery.
  • If the entire world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
  • Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom’s wise words: “Don’t pick that up, you don’t know where it’s been.”
  • I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with ‘Guess’ on it I said, Implants?
  • If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
  • If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
  • If you’re born again, do you have two bellybuttons?
  • How is it possible to have a civil war?
  • If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
  • Is a pig disgruntled?
  • Nice guys finish last and bring you breakfast in bed.
  • Are you into casual sex or should I dress up?
  • You’ll need to know my name you’ll be screaming it later.
  • I lost my virginity but I still have the box it came in.
  • Why hemorrhoids are called “hemorrhoids” instead of “asteroids”?
  • Why is it called tourist season if we can’t shoot at them?
  • If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn’t the whole aeroplane made out of the stuff?
  • Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
  • Don’t sweat the petty things & don’t pet the sweaty things.
  • The main reason Santa is so jolly is because, he knows where all the bad girls live.
  • I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, “Where’s the self-help section?” She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
  • Could you drive any better if I shoved that cell phone up your.
  • And, whose cruel idea was it for the word “Lisp” to have a “S” in it?
  • Damn Girl, I’m so glad I’m not blind.
  • I lost my number, can I have yours?
  • But what if I’m a figment of my OWN imagination?
  • If God hadn’t wanted me to be paranoid, He wouldn’t have given me such a vivid imagination.
  • Use your imagination not to scare yourself to death but to inspire yourself to life.
  • Drama is imagination limited by logic. Mathematics is logic limited by imagination.

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