I don’t believe in Santa Claus – he’s fiction
The Easter Bunny never did exist
A lucky star is purely contradiction
A Prince is not a frog who has been kissed.
No bridge has ever had a bad troll under
Some Princess never slept for thirty years
No ogres ever ripped a town asunder
At Halloween no wicked witch appears.
The Yeti isn’t big or real or hairy
Strange UFOs have never came to Earth
The garden hasn’t elf or nymph or fairy
A Phoenix never rises in rebirth.
If Peter Pan existed he was stupid
I reckon he was just a teenage punk
And don’t you try and tell me there’s a Cupid
It’s only love-starved fools believe that junk.
I’ve never seen a ghost – there’s no hereafter,
You can’t tell me the Bogeyman is real
Those tales of magic carpets bring me laughter
No vampire ever made a neck a meal.
There’s no such thing as pixies – they’re all phony
The monster in the wardrobe is a fake
Your birthday wish is nonsense – pure baloney
They’re simply stupid candles on a cake.
I’ve never once believed in myth or magic
I will not credit something till I’m shown
My marriage (there were three) all ended tragic
And now I live reality alone.
Your happiness is all hallucination
It’s just a silly fairy tale you feel
Without a grain of proof or confirmation
I wonder why you think that love is real.
By – Graeme King