Funny-Quotes-About-Computers, Geek-Quotes P2
Beware the information super-cliche!!
It's a FLAW, dammit, not a bug!
Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers.
Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.
Any technology
distinguishable from magic is insufficiently advanced.
Artificial Intelligence is the study of how to make real
computers act like the
ones in movies.
A paperless office
has about as much chance as a paperless bathroom.
A program is never finished until the programmer dies.
A user-friendly computer first requires a friendly user.
Bad or missing mouse driver. Spank the cat [Y/N]?
Disclaimer: Any errors in spelling, tact or fact
are transmission errors.
Every time I type win I lose!
To err is human, but
to really foul things up requires a computer.
When I was a kid, my parents told me what to do. When I went to school, my
teachers told me what to do. Now I'm married, and my husband tells me what to
do. I'm not going to use a
computer and let it tell me what to do.
How an engineer writes a program: start by debugging an empty file.
If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0
To be, or not to be, those are the parameters.
User error: replace user and press any key to continue.
What boots up must come down.
It is impossible to
make anything foolproof,
because fools are so ingenious.
Calm down - it's only ones and zeros!
Error, no keyboard - press F1 to continue.
You can make it foolproof, but you can't make it damnfoolproof.
Do witches run spell checkers?
My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
BREAKFAST.COM Halted - Cereal port not responding.
Hidden DOS secret: add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS
Error reading FAT record; try the SKINNY one (Y/N)?
Bother, said Pooh, as he deleted UNIX from his machine.
Compassion -- that's the one thing no machine ever had.
Complexity of a Mac user:- The number of buttons on the mouse.
Computers aren't intelligent, they only think they are.
Data convinces the Coke machine that Pepsi is better.
Data convinces the Pepsi machine that Coke is better!
EMACS: Eight Megs And Constantly Swapping
Go not to the machines for counsel, for they will say both 0 and 1.
God is real, unless declared integer.
God made machine language; all the rest is the work of man.
How can you respect a machine controlled by a mouse?
IBM: Its Better Manually
IBM: Intercourse Beats Masturbation
IBM: Intimidation By Marketing
IBM: Ishoulda Boughta Mac
IBM: It's Broken Man
IBM: Inferiorly Built Machine
IBM: I befriended Microsoft (remember 1980?)
IBM: I'd Buy Macintosh
IBM: I Blame Microsoft
IBM: Institute of Black
Magicians.
If a train station is
where the train stops, what's a work station?
Intel: Putting the backward in backward compatible.
Its only a macro, only a macro, only a macro...
Just a 2 bit programmer on a 32 bit machine.
Let the machine do the dirty work (Elements of Programming Style).
Macintosh: Machine Always Crashes If Not OS Hangs.
Macintosh error message: Like, dude, something went wrong.
Macintosh, adj. The excuse for not wanting to learn computing.
Macintosh: The etch-a-sketch you don't
have to shake to clear the screen!
Macintosh: Computer With Training Wheels You Can't Remove.
IBM: In Being Mended
Disinformation is not
as good as datinformation.
Disk Full - Press F1 to belch.
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
DOS Tip 17: Add DEVICE=FNGRCROS.SYS to CONFIG.SYS
E Pluribus Modem
E-mail returned to sender -- insufficient voltage.
Error - BEER.CAN contains a null value. User not loaded
Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny
Eunuchs, the non-gender-specific OS
Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I.
Excuse me for butting in, but I'm interrupt-driven.
File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
Help! I'm modeming... and I can't hang up!
How do I set my Laser printer to Stun?
I hit the CTRL key but I'm still not in control!
I/O, I/O, it's off to work we go.
ID10T error at
keyboard; replace user, strike any key when complete.
Keep the CPU virgin, do not remove HIMEM.SYS
KLANS.MAN found, unable to open MIND
Klingon error: Strike
any other user to continue.
LIFE.EXE found...download now? (Y/N)
Mary had a little RAM- about a MEG or so.
Modem is not responding... Send APB for serial killer (Y/N)
Mouse found, place in maze (Y/N)
MOUTH Opened...Insert FOOT? (Y/N)
Not tonight dear.... I have a modem.
Old McDonald had a computer, with EIA I/O.
One if by LAN, 2 if by C, 3 if by ERR.
Pentiums melt in your PC, not in your hand.
Press <> to continue...
Press any key to continue or any other key to quit.
Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!
Press Ctrl-Alt-Del now for IQ test.
PTOMAINE found (A)bort (R)egurgitate (P)uke
RAM disk is not an installation procedure.
REALITY.SYS corrupted: Reboot universe? (Y/N/Q)
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